“Leave me alone! Forget me!”
I wanted to wish you a happy birthday, but that is far too simple, and you either do not care or you do not care about mere words. In any case, I no longer even know you, considering that fifteen years have already passed. Nevertheless, my wishes for your happiness remain. I left you in peace many years ago, and you know that for a long time now I have not been “stalking” you. I do not look at Facebook or Instagram, nor at academic publications, let alone content on Spotify or YouTube.
I learned a very important lesson in a toxic relationship I once had and, from that experience, I discovered through lived reality the reason why I have a duty to let you live in peace. The feeling of possession, of control, jealousy mixed with hints of envy, is the worst thing one human being can feel towards another, and I experienced this first-hand. To reach where I wish to arrive, I must first make a brief digression, because I need to speak to you directly and, at the end, ask for your blessing, so that both your spirit and mine may live in peace. Perhaps not in happiness, but in peace. The truth is that after you I was never again able to love anyone. I never again had a real relationship. All of them were based purely on interest, sometimes physical interest, at other times emotional interest, and once or twice purely financial interest, which ended up corrupting part of my being. But let us turn to the digressions:
Believe it or not, I am a kind of ‘fallen angel’. I am not the sort of ‘demon’ as popular culture describes it; I am a kind of ‘investigative’ spirit whose principal mission is message-bearing and communication with the higher plane. In general terms, I am a messenger. This grants me passage through territories that most people do not even imagine exist. Yes, I can walk through hell and through what Christians call ‘purgatory’. I do not, however, have access to the heavens, as I am forbidden to enter them by a higher will and also as a consequence of misguided choices I have made on this material plane, such as the consumption of toxic substances, lust, and so on; the list of sins is extensive.
Nevertheless, God Almighty and merciful granted me a chance at redemption, and here I am. I cannot say exactly what my mission here is, or perhaps at times I am lazy, but what matters is that I have a kind of ‘free pass’ to walk through spiritual planes.
From this, I infer that my task is to record the works, the paths, and the arts of the Enemy and of his servants here on this material plane. Our Lord Almighty already knows all of this, yet I must carry out a form of inventory: to speculate, to dilute his methods, and to reveal his presence wherever it may be.
The Enemy does not welcome my presence here and, despite the fact that I possess a divine safeguard, he attempts to attack me by every means available. The truth is that he cannot attack me directly because of divine protection. In response, he can attack all those around me who are weak or who have weakened in the course of their faith: those who do not believe or who mock God, those who are excessively bound to the weaknesses of the flesh, those who lack mercy, and so forth. The list is extensive.
In this way, the Enemy uses people close to me who possess spiritual weaknesses to attack me, with a single objective: that they kill me, so that my soul may perhaps be sent to hell. Yet the Enemy forgets that, despite possessing many powers and tricks, God stands above all things, and that there is no force nor any power except in the Most High Father, amen.
This occurred in a toxic relationship I once had, entered into out of pure financial interest, and the outcome was far from favourable. My former girlfriend truly wishes to kill me and, in some manner, she realises that she failed to do so because of divine will. I feel deep pity for her, for I know that it is not she who truly desires this, but rather the malevolent forces to which she has improperly surrendered herself.
We have been apart for several years, and the fact is that, just as I once was with you — that is, unwilling to forget you, driven by a feeling of possession, wanting you exclusively for myself — so too is this former girlfriend of mine. Yet, even though I was immature and selfish, I never wished her any harm, my distant friend Kárie. At heart, I was merely immature and lacked full knowledge of my own emotions. This former girlfriend of mine, whose name I do not dare pronounce, is entirely different. She harbours a mixture of ‘love’ and hatred, something extremely dangerous, and she operates through any hidden paths available to harm me.
Knowing this, one day I used one of my gifts to invade her dream. I entered her dream without her realising it and began to manipulate events so as to fulfil all her wishes. The first desire she revealed was to see me suffer greatly for many years and then die in the most torturous manner possible. I shall not disclose the details, in order to spare you the time, but the level of cruelty was extreme, and in the end she laughed uncontrollably and felt complete. Yet I did not stop there. After she had seen that her wish had been fulfilled, I continued to feed her desire. She then asked for what every human being on this planet desires: first, beauty, a beautiful body, a flawless face, the sensuality of movement. Then she asked for money, so that she might spend it and humiliate those beneath her. Finally, she asked for power, eventually attaining a position of very high authority in society. She was entirely happy, fulfilled, and satisfied, for all her desires had been realised, until a certain moment in the dream when she sensed that something was amiss. She felt my presence and, for a few milliseconds, I was almost trapped in her dream, unable to return, such was the fury she experienced upon realising that she had been deceived and that, in the end, everything had been an illusion.
My purpose in invading her dream was purely didactic: I wished to demonstrate that there is only one kind of power in this world that grants us everything we ask for, namely, the power of the Enemy. God, by contrast, never gives us what we ask for; God gives us only what is necessary for our spiritual refinement. Herein lies the great difference between what belongs to the plane of the Malignant and what belongs to the plane of the Divine. To love God means sacrifice, patience, knowledge, respect, and things that demand great effort. The Adversary of humanity, on the other hand, offers only easy things, such as immediate pleasure, conquest, ambition, and selfishness.
From that point onward, my former girlfriend came to hate me even more. I do not know what she may be capable of doing, yet I am unconcerned, for there is no power that can be compared with God. The blood of Jesus Christ was shed precisely for this reason, to protect us from this kind of threat, and whatever must come to pass will come to pass, with the blessing of our beloved Lord.
Now you must be wondering: what kind of madness is this, and what does it have to do with you? This is where you come in. When we ended our relationship fifteen years ago, there was some kind of spiritual rupture, for we were very closely bound, almost like siblings. This never happened to me again, and I am certain it never will. I do not like to speculate, yet I am almost certain that, although you may have loved or cared for someone else, you did not experience this either. Such things do not happen frequently, nor do they happen to everyone.
You too are a spiritual agent. I do not know whether you are also a messenger like me, but that is of little importance. What matters is that we share a connection, something that lies beyond the material plane, and when we separated we created a definitive rupture. I want it to be very clear that I do not wish to speak with you, I do not expect you to read this or to respond, I do not wish to be your friend, and I expect nothing. That is untrue: I do hope that you read this text carefully, for the very purpose of writing it is to ask for your blessing. You may argue that I should ask this of God, and I already have. All the spiritual paths that have been indicated to me point to the fact that I need something that only you can give me.
I need your blessing, and in some way you need it as well. We must free ourselves from this cycle of violence and hatred.
I want you to understand that, although I am protected by God, my choices greatly limit my paths, and I am not immune to spells. To be as direct as possible, I believe that I have been cursed in such a severe manner that I am no longer able to form relationships with any woman. It is as though there were a blockage, an invisible wall, something malevolent that prevents anyone from approaching me, and you know exactly what I am referring to. In this respect, if one compares it with the end of our relationship, you blessed me, you set me free, you wished me happiness. After you, many different women appeared in my life, and I had dozens of relationships. The sole reason none of them succeeded or developed into a serious relationship was that I did not want them to, for my selfishness still bound me to you, Kárie.
There is more. This person of whom I speak knows of your existence and hates you as much as she hates me, because one day I ended up confessing to her that I had loved only one person in my life. This caused no small disturbance in her mind, and she seeks revenge. As she cannot accomplish this revenge in the material world, she turns to the demands of the spiritual realm.
I ask for your blessing. We need to free ourselves from this. I do not know exactly what you must do, yet one thing I do know: only you are capable of breaking this spell, only you are capable of freeing yourself and freeing me from this prison. I do not know whether you must pray for me, nor which spiritual paths you should follow; I have no idea. I know only that you are the key to both your own liberation and happiness and to mine.
I do not hold you responsible, and I understand your reasons. Yet the choice of silence throughout all these years created a very strong barrier, almost unbreakable, a wall of lamentation in which our losses have accumulated over time, and as a result neither you nor I can be fully happy.
See, I am not asking you to break your vow of silence. I am asking you to seek the truth. In the same way that it appeared to me, it must have appeared to you as well. I earnestly ask that, just this once, you listen to me. Bless me, release me from this cycle in the name of God Almighty.
You deserve to be happy, I deserve to be happy, and even my former girlfriend deserves to be happy. She will never realise that she is merely a puppet in the Enemy’s sadistic games, regardless of how I attempt to demonstrate this, and we know that there is only one force capable of defeating this Evil. Only love exists. Pure, surrendered love is blessed by God, capable of breaking any chain, redeeming any fear, crossing any valley of the shadow of death, going down into hell and returning in safety.
I need you to set me free. And, so that it is clearly marked, I am not attempting to manipulate you into speaking with me, nor am I expecting anything in return. The purpose is to celebrate your birthday and, at the same time, to speak of something serious that has troubled me, and troubled you, for these fifteen years.
Please, Kárie, you need to release this energy. I cannot tell you what you must do, yet I can tell you this: seek God, and when you seek Him, the answers will come. Only He can tell you what must be done. I have no idea.
From the moment you fulfil your destiny and free yourself from these bonds, I too shall be free. If what I have asked is done, you will never again see a post of mine on this blog, and, as agreed upon spiritually, I will never even think of you again. When I do, it will be to bless you and to wish you the very best, far away from me.
Shabbat Shalom, my sister. Remain in the peace of the Lord.
C. H. H. Barbosa - Bond and redemption
